


Food and Cheer and Song

by motheyes



Category: The Adventure Zone (Podcast)
Genre: Angst with a Happy Ending, Canon Compliant, Cooking, Food as a Metaphor for Love, Multi, in which i really try to hammer home the idea i had and it's very noticeable, literally thats the whole thesis of the fic, overused symbolism
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-07
Updated: 2020-07-07
Packaged: 2021-03-05 00:22:06
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,068
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25125376
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/motheyes/pseuds/motheyes
Summary: Taako cooks for seven.(or: a study of cooking and family throughout the adventure zone: balance)
Relationships: Barry Bluejeans/Lup (mentioned), Kravitz/Taako (The Adventure Zone), Lup & Taako (The Adventure Zone), Taako (The Adventure Zone) & Everyone
Comments: 12
Kudos: 68





	Food and Cheer and Song

Taako cooks for seven.

He doesn't know why; it's always just been him and Sazed on the road, as long as he can remember. Still, though, whenever he doesn't think about portion sizes, whenever he's distracted when he cooks, he instinctively adds enough ingredients for seven. 

There are a couple recipes, too, that stick with him, though he doesn't remember where he learned them and his head hurts if he thinks about it too hard. He cooks macarons and studiously ignores the static buzzing in his head. He bakes cookies for the thousandth time and hums a song he doesn't remember learning. 

There's one thing, at least, that his overcooking helps with - samples for viewers of his show. He cooks in abundance and gives away the extra (because what were he and Sazed going to do with it, anyway?) It works well, until it doesn't, and then thirty people are dead in Glamor Springs and Taako can _never show his face again._ Sazed leaves. 

After that, Taako doesn't cook for anyone. Not for a long, long time.

-o0o-

The next time he cooks is ten years later, after Phandolin has been melted to the ground and replaced with black glass. He's clutching his not-quite-umbrella and staring off the edge of the not-quite-moon when he decides he's ready to try again. 

He doesn't transmute the ingredients, not trusting himself to do that just yet. He does, however, pay the weird cat warlock a visit and buy them. 

The meal comes out remarkably well, for someone who hasn't even touched a stove in as long a time as he has.

-o0o-

It's several weeks and several more attempts at cooking sans-magic before he thinks he's finally ready to try transmutation again.

He stands behind the counter, shaky hands gripping the handle of the umbrastaff. The untransmuted ingredients sit in front of him. 

He takes a deep breath, tries to reassure himself once more, and casts the spell. When he opens his eyes again (he hadn't even realized he'd closed them), herbs and carrots and celery lay on the counter

He takes a hesitant bite. They taste fine, no hint of bitter poison.

The final product, brined turkey, is delicious, but he can't quite bring himself to share it with anyone just yet. Just in case.

-o0o-

Then, it's Candlenights. 

Taako thinks, _I can do this_. 

He dredges up a recipe for elderflower macarons from somewhere in his memory. It buzzes like voidfish static. (He attributes that to the age of the memory.)

The cookies are a hit, to say the least. He's certainly anxious about having everyone else eat his cooking for the first time in Pan-knows how long, but that's quickly forgotten as the Director takes a frantic call from Lucas Miller, and then they (he and Merle and Magnus) are off on an adventure again.

The name Lucretia fits into his brain perfectly, as though it’s returning home from a ten-year journey.

-o0o-

The kid, Agnes or whatever, works for the Bureau now. Begrudgingly, Taako gives him lessons. They started as _strictly_ magic, but quickly derailed into cooking as well. Taako tried to dissuade the kid, but, well. What was he supposed to say to those round, innocent eyes? 

(“Don't tease me! I would have taught the kid anyway, I didn’t give in to shit,” he says to an empty room. He doesn't know who he's talking to. The umbrastaff leans against his dresser.) 

Agnes cooks macarons, a perfect imitation of Taako's, except for the absent taste. (He doesn’t find it endearing. He _doesn’t._ ) 

Taako moves to transmute them, to do the kid a favor, but instead, he lights them on fire, and then he lights the cafeteria wall on fire, and then he's staring at the burning letters L U P engraved into the wall. 

Agnes, the smart kid detective that he is, sprints off to look for clues immediately. Taako can only stare in shock, flames reflected in his wide eyes.

(His head still buzzes with static.)

-o0o-

Next is a small town in the middle of the desert, surrounded (protected) by a nigh-impenetrable bubble. There’s a clay-filled suit of armor and a bank robbery and something shattering the ground and swallowing the earth whole as the clock strikes noon. Then, there’s a woman on an endless plane of pure white and then they’re awake again and the day is starting over.

That’s all in the back of Taako’s mind as he talks to the proprietor of the Davy Lamp. Her name’s Ren. She’s a _fan_ of his. He’s the reason she started cooking. He’s the reason she’s here today. 

He hasn’t met a fan in so long. The way her eyes light up in delight when she recognizes him is a novel feeling he’d almost forgotten.

So, that’s why he feels bad when he cons her out of a whole bunch of diamonds. 

He doesn’t have a whole lot of time to dwell on it, though. There’s a fortuneteller to see and a bank robbery to stop participate in and mine puzzles to figure out.

And then, he’s watching the scene of his greatest failure.

Or - no, wait, it wasn’t really a failure at all, especially not his -

And, giddily, he nearly laughs in the face of the chalice when she offers to undo it. It’s _his_ cooking and _his_ work and it _was_ his greatest failure but not anymore. _Not anymore._

His cooking is his and it always has been.

And so, the bubble breaks, and a hundred people come pouring out, and Taako repays those diamonds with a diploma and a friendship.

-o0o-

He doesn't have a lot of time, after that. It's either relic hunting or training for more relic hunting or just training in general, all mandated by Lucretia (or, as she insists, Madame Director, although that isn’t quite as comfortable as her actual first name, somehow.)

In the brief moments of downtime he gets, though, he cooks. It's still for seven, which is a major waste of ingredients, considering it's usually just him eating the results. So, often, whatever dish he was cooking is thrown in the garbage untouched. Sometimes, though, on good days - sometimes he pawns the extra food off on Magnus and Merle. 

Overall, things are… pretty good, actually.

He meets Kravitz again. They go to the Chug ‘N’ Squeeze to discuss business - though they decidedly do not do so, in the end. 

On the way back to Taako's room, the umbrastaff acts up again. Taako's blind panic saves Kravitz's pretty face from getting burnt off. Kravitz leaves pretty quickly after that, tearing a hole in the fabric of spacetime and disappearing back to the astral plane.

They have plans to meet again, though, so that's a score.

-o0o-

Wonderland is a blur of flashing lights and pain and _suffering_. He loses some of his beauty, his face changing shape ever so slightly. Maybe it’s vain of him, but somehow, that hurts more than the machinery falling on his legs or the loss of his dexterity. 

He sees Kravitz through the portal as he yanks Magnus back from the brink of death. He guesses that there's probably a rain check on their plans. 

They only barely escape with the help of a Red Robe. Said Red Robe wears jeans, sturdy, denim, and blue, and Merle breaks down cackling as he realizes the identity of the lich, and, huh.

Taako isn't surprised. He didn't know the reveal was coming, of course, but somehow he isn't surprised by the information it presents. The fact that Barry Goddamn Bluejeans is a lich just slots perfectly into a hole in his brain. 

The constant, underlying static grows ever louder.

-o0o-

Magnus' shitty jokes about creating an Anti-Bureau of Balance aren't so funny now.

Taako can only look on uncomfortably as Carey breaks down sobbing at Magnus' supposed death. He can’t imagine what it must be like to be Magnus at that moment. Lucretia hides it better than Carey does, but Taako knows her well enough now to see the pure _grief_ behind her eyes. 

(He feels… guilty, about taking advantage of that to sneak around.)

It turns out that Garfield was always a creepy motherfucker, just as all of them thought. Magnus does his thing, promising a distraction to Taako, Merle, and Barry as they make a break for Lucretia’s office.

After some trial and error (including picking up an unforeseen child detective), they get there.

They find a second voidfish.

The din of the alarm is _almost_ enough to drown out that constant static as Taako frantically chugs down the baby voidfish's juice. 

Barry collapses, and then Taako collapses, and then Merle collapses, and then Taako remembers everything as memories drown out Lucretia’s voice in the background. 

He remembers Lup and every single cycle and the beach and Lup and the conservatory and _Lup, how could he forget Lup of all people_ -

And, oh. Suddenly the cooking for seven makes sense. Suddenly he remembers where he learned all those recipes. Suddenly, he remembers cooking Lup brined turkey on the best day of her life.

Most of the following fight is a blur of panic and adrenaline. He vaguely remembers threatening Lucretia, vaguely remembers the Hunger crashing itself through the glass ceiling of the dome. 

What he does remember _perfectly_ is the way that the umbrastaff is knocked out of his hand and the way he _realizes._

He snaps the umbrastaff in half, and there she is, phantasmal and resplendent. 

(She's also immediately back to teasing him about his choice in men. _God_ , he’s missed her _so much_.) 

Lup's plan to free the dead includes Taako pushing himself further than he's ever pushed before. He can't do it, and he can't do it a second time, and suddenly he remembers Istus' gift to him and he tears it out of his bags and removes a small mirror.

It's the end of the world and Taako meets a kid named Joaquin who runs a food cart.

There’s just one thing that’s never failed Taako in any situation - food. So, they cook. 

In the end, Joaquin has magic powers and leaves to take care of his world, and Taako?

Taako slams his hands down on the surface of what was once Phandolin and green emerald stains black glass. 

Kravitz appears. He kicks ass. Taako thinks he loves him.

-o0o-

The Starblaster flies for the first time in a decade. Lead by Capn’port, it flies into the oncoming storm, drums pounding in Taako's ears and lilting violin echoing in his mind. 

Los Tres Horny Boys hold their own against John. Ultimately, though, they call for help, and help responds. 

Joaquin appears again, when Taako summons him, just one among a long list of friends and companions that the Birds aboard the Starblaster have found.

John dies. 

It's been over a hundred years of constant running for their lives and John finally _dies_. 

Also, Taako meets God, which is objectively cool as shit. 

When they get back from the weird pocket dimension that Jeffandrew warped them to, Magnus yells Johann's name and message for all to hear. Taako looks up at Angus, sitting on Magnus’ shoulders, and he looks out over the crowd of people who fought valiantly by their side, and he sees no-longer-forgotten family.

-o0o-

In the year following the Day of Story of Song, Taako opens a whole ass school for magic. Ren’s his deputy headmaster, of course; there’s noone else better suited for the job. 

He tries to convince Angus to attend, and then later, to teach, though Angus seems deadset on Lucas’ school. (Taako teases him about this every chance he gets, though his tone is soft and not biting.) 

Most importantly, though, Taako cooks. A lot. 

Kravitz moves in with him, and he makes his best efforts to make it to dinner (homemade every night) despite his wack ass hours working as the grim reaper. Sometimes, when they’re particularly lucky, grim-reapers-in-training Lup and Barry tag along as guests. 

One time, Taako jokes that people should stop dying so that they can have a nice moment for once. Kravitz laughs and calls him an idiot affectionately. 

Taako loves him. 

A year after the Day of Story and Song, Carey and Killian finally get married. Merle officiates, Magnus is best man, and Taako cooks. 

Taako cooks for many, many more than seven.

**Author's Note:**

> heyo!! thank you for taking the time to read this all the way through. i was hit with an Idea back in like.... may........ and only took the time to finish and clean this up about an hour ago. braincell gave me one coherent thought and left me completely in the dust for a whole month and a half.
> 
> i may finally be back on my feet, so i'm gonna hopefully be writing more stuff in the near future, taz or otherwise.
> 
> one more time, thank you so much for reading. i hope you enjoyed.


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